Yo Ho Ho and a Gallon of Pee.

There are one or two tests that Dr Lewis (my new CFS doc) has asked me to have done and I did a couple on Monday.

One in particular was pretty awful, so of course that’s what I’m going to tell you about. I’ll try not to be too graphic.

When I rang to make an appointment for the tests, the girl insisted that I needed to come see them so that they could “explain things”.

I fursed about it to WonderHubby, and then went to see them.
Control freaks.

When I went in I learnt that it wasn’t to tell me anything, it was to give me something. And not an early birthday present, either.

The nurse took me into a private room and then disappeared into a cupboard. She reappeared holding a 4 litre bottle.

That’s right, US viewers, it held almost a gallon.

“What’s that for?” I asked innocently.

“It’s for your 24 hour urine test.”

“I beg your pardon? How much do you pee each day?” No, I didn’t say it, but I was thinking it.

I definitely fursed under my breath though. We buy milk in smaller bottles.

To make matters worse, the hole through which I had to pee was just over an inch across.

Who exactly designs these things? They never thought a woman would use one, that’s for sure.

I seriously needed a funnel, people.

In the end, I ended up with less than two litres in the bottle, which must have been a huge disappointment for whomever was doing the testing.

I still can’t work out which was the worst part.

Providing the… erm, liquid, or carrying a huge, sloshing bottle of it through the shopping centre in my shoulder bag.

Euww….